Let’s face it, forgiveness can be tough! The way others treat us can range from mildly offensive to devastatingly brutal and all points in between. It can leave us with bruises and scars that can last a long time. Unfortunately, these wounds can continue to fester in our spirits long after we think we have put them behind us. Eventually these toxic events can cause a septic response in our spirit. This doesn’t just, “go away,” it must be dealt with.
“Just how do I do that?” You may be wondering.
To understand the key to forgiving others, we must look at how God forgives us. I have found that when I struggle to forgive people who have hurt me, it is helpful to get into the Bible and dig a little deeper into understanding how God has forgiven me. The more I do that, the more I learn about grace.
Grace, as you may have heard, is unmerited favor. I don’t deserve grace (then it wouldn’t be grace), I don’t deserve forgiveness.
But God… (What a GREAT phrase from the Bible)
Because God is gracious, because He has accepted the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ, and because He is rich in mercy, withholds the judgment I deserve and extends the forgiveness that I don’t merit.
Did you know that in the Greek language from which the New Testament was translated that the root word for “forgiveness” is the same word that is translated “grace”?
Amazing isn’t it?
So, how does this impact my forgiving others?
Because God has forgiven me for the sake of His Son, He expects me to forgive those who hurt me. Just as God graciously extends that to me, I can extend that to the offenders in my life. To whatever extent God has forgiven me, He wants me to extend that same grace to others.
You may be reading this and thinking, “But that person was wrong and I am right!” Or, “They don’t deserve my forgiveness!” Or even, “They haven’t asked for my forgiveness!” And you might very well be correct in those assessments. However, those objections really aren’t relevant to your forgiving that person. The single most important factor in giving this grace to others is that it becomes an act of obedience to God.
Here’s the thing, God wants that person to have grace, just as He wanted you to have it. Since you were the offended party, He wants you to pass the grace along, and in so doing, set yourself free from all of the baggage you have been carrying as a result of whatever may have happened. That freedom is nearly indescribable and once you receive it, you will see a marvelous difference in numerous areas of your life.
I have challenged myself with this question, “If God wants that person to have grace, who am I to withhold it?”
Who needs grace from you right now?